Compatibility/Love and friendship
Friends
Friends choose each other freely, and can drift apart just as freely when nobody makes the effort. Here is how two types tend to get along as friends, from how often you meet to how you help each other through a bad week.
Pick a type, or use a test result for exact scores.
Pick a type, or use a test result for exact scores.
Pick two people to see how they fit
Choose a type for each, or use test results for exact scores. Not sure of someone's type? Browse the sixteen.
What we look at as friends
Four areas, each read from one scale, then how you handle pressure. How the gauge works
Perception N/S
Common ground
What you talk about and like doing together.
Each point between your scores costs 1.5 points
Energy E/I
Time together
How often you meet, and in how big a group.
Each point between your scores costs 1.25 points
Decisions T/F
Support
What you offer when the other is struggling: solutions or sympathy.
Each point between your scores costs 0.75 points
Structure J/P
Making plans
Who suggests, who books and how firm a plan is.
Each point between your scores costs 0.5 points
Composure
Hard times
How you lean on each other under stress, from both Composure scores.
Shown separately, not part of the fit
What the research says
Friends tend to resemble each other in many ways, from background to values (McPherson et al., 2001). Yet among students getting to know each other, feeling alike predicted how close they became better than measured similarity in personality did (Selfhout et al., 2009). Shared time and goodwill count for more than shared letters.
- McPherson, M., Smith-Lovin, L., and Cook, J. M. (2001). Birds of a feather: Homophily in social networks. Annual Review of Sociology, 27, 415-444.
- Selfhout, M., Denissen, J., Branje, S., and Meeus, W. (2009). In the eye of the beholder: Perceived, actual, and peer-rated similarity in personality, communication, and friendship intensity during the acquaintanceship process. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 96(6), 1152-1165.
Other settings
Every setting reads the same five scores through the areas that matter there.
Love and friendship
Partners
Dating, living together or married: how two styles share a life.
Compare two types
Family
Parent and child
What a child needs, what a parent naturally gives, and where they meet.
Compare two types
Family
Siblings
Growing up side by side, and staying close as adults.
Compare two types
Work
Colleagues
Sharing projects, meetings and deadlines as peers.
Compare two types
Work
Manager and team member
Direction, check-ins, feedback and room to work.
Compare two types