Compatibility/Family
Parent and child
Parents and children do not choose each other's temperament. Things tend to go best when what a parent expects fits who the child really is, an idea called goodness of fit (Thomas and Chess, 1977). For a young child, pick the type you see most often and hold it lightly, since personality is still taking shape.
Pick a type, or use a test result for exact scores.
Pick a type, or use a test result for exact scores.
Pick two people to see how they fit
Choose a type for each, or use test results for exact scores. Not sure of someone's type? Browse the sixteen.
What we look at as parent and child
Four areas, each read from one scale, then how you handle pressure. How the gauge works
Energy E/I
Energy and downtime
How much company, activity and quiet each of you needs.
Each point between your scores costs 1.5 points
Structure J/P
Routines and rules
Bedtimes, homework, mess and schedules.
Each point between your scores costs 1.25 points
Decisions T/F
Discipline and warmth
How rules are explained and feelings are handled.
Each point between your scores costs 1 point
Perception N/S
Learning and play
Hands-on and concrete, or imaginative and abstract.
Each point between your scores costs 0.5 points
Composure
Big feelings
How stress and strong emotion travel between you, from both Composure scores.
Shown separately, not part of the fit
What the research says
Developmental research has long held that children do best when what their parents expect fits their temperament (Thomas and Chess, 1977). A meta-analysis found that parents who are emotionally steadier, more agreeable and more conscientious tend to show more warmth and structure, though the effects are modest (Prinzie et al., 2009). Personality keeps developing well into adulthood (Roberts et al., 2006), so treat a child's type as a working guess.
- Thomas, A., and Chess, S. (1977). Temperament and Development. Brunner/Mazel.
- Prinzie, P., Stams, G. J. J. M., Deković, M., Reijntjes, A. H. A., and Belsky, J. (2009). The relations between parents' Big Five personality factors and parenting: A meta-analytic review. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 97(2), 351-362.
- Roberts, B. W., Walton, K. E., and Viechtbauer, W. (2006). Patterns of mean-level change in personality traits across the life course. Psychological Bulletin, 132(1), 1-25.
Other settings
Every setting reads the same five scores through the areas that matter there.
Love and friendship
Partners
Dating, living together or married: how two styles share a life.
Compare two types
Love and friendship
Friends
What you do together, what you talk about and how you show up.
Compare two types
Family
Siblings
Growing up side by side, and staying close as adults.
Compare two types
Work
Colleagues
Sharing projects, meetings and deadlines as peers.
Compare two types
Work
Manager and team member
Direction, check-ins, feedback and room to work.
Compare two types